This atheist is playing really hard-to-get, but you snog him anyway.
(He'll get over it.........eventually!)

You put anthrax on the mistltoe and tell co-workers it's just powdered snow...

You eat the chocolates out of your little brother's advent calendar, then VERY carefully shut all the doors.

You loan braille books from the library and iron the pages.

You pick last weeks lottery numbers, sneakily put on a tape of the draw and tell your other half to watch and check the no.s while you 'go to the loo'.

You set off a loud firework on Xmas eve night then run in the house and tell the kids Xmas is cancelled as Santa's just shot himself.

You spend the money that your Nan gave you to buy her lottery tickets with on chocolate, and hope that her numbers don't come up this week.

...somebody asks how nice you thought you were, you tell them how nice you thought you were, but then they tell you that you're not as nice as you thought you were... next time somebody asks that question you will have a more accurate answer for them... bearing in mind that niceness is variable over time.

... you start defending the actions of Hitler during History class.

... you notice your neighbours' house is on fire and that they're trapped inside, but you think to yourself "they parked in my driveway without permission one day last year, this is simply karma doing it's job", and instead sit down to watch the kind of neighbours you prefer... the kind that you can find on BBC1 twice daily.

Your're the only person at work who's done a first aid course, but the woman dying on the floor is a bit ugly so you pretend you don't know what to do; as it would involve mouth to mouth.

You run over next door's cat, then make sympathetic noises when your neighbour tells you it's missing, and join in the search!