June's Game Report
Friday, Conner won the Countdown Final of course, and yet this 14 year old claims he is 'no use at English'. After the ads break we were back at the dream factory again. Noel welcomed us saying that Rich had played a perfect game, he was never going to get more than £20,000. Sorry Noel but I just don't agree.
As the lights flashed I could see in the background that James was back. Soon the flashing stopped, today's player was going to be June (best get her off the program before they kill her if yesterday was anything to go by). She took the walk of wealth with box 7. June was from Cambridge, a retired accounts clerk and singer, Miss Marple on valium. She would like to buy a cottage in France if she won the big one, but she was not lucky, her father used to pay her not to bet on the same horses as him, so she won more money from her dad than from gambling. She had a system, she had come prepared with some numbers.
Round one: Drew started with box 2 - £20,000 - 'oooo Drew', said June reproaching him. Louise, box 18 - £5000. Richard, box 20, he tried to warn her 'I've had blues so far'. She hardly blinked, 'its not how you start, its how you finish', so Richard opened his box - £100,000. June looked to her numbers, box 7 was going to be next, but Noel realised that would be a problem, it was June's box. We then discovered that June's numbers were produced by raffle and after Noel scoffed, she ripped them up and threw the pieces on the floor, saying 'anything for you Noel'. She went to the 'little green man', Colin. Today I could hear what he said, but that didn't make much difference: 'there was a man sweeping the street this morning, he was arrested by 49 policemen - there's £50 in there'. You see what I mean? Colin opened box 8 - £100 - I want to like Colin but whatever he is trying to do, its going over my head. James finished the round with box 18 - £3000. The Banker thought June was terrific, he was going to miss her peeking out over the top of her boxes. The offer was £3700 - 'thats not bad is it', she said thinking, and then she said, 'Janie, number 10'. Noel doubled up in laughter, eventually June was coaxed to say - 'No deal'.
Round two: After all that June didn't go with Janie, she chose Daz, Box 5 - £15,000. Peter was next with box 15 - £750. Box 13 by Simone was opened after the break - 1p - and June shouted only slightly louder than the audience, or was it that the mic was nearer to her? Noel double-checked that she understood the process for handling the offer. He then picked up the phone and after listening for a few moments said, 'I'm not passing this on'. June responded, 'Tell me yourself, you coward', and Noel passed across the receiver wishing the Banker luck. 'Hello sexy' said June, an unexpected and very funny moment. She then told the Banker she was 82 years old, the lady had just achieved a whole new level of respect from her audience. The offer was £9000. 'No deal'. She was determined and this was only the end of round two, but this sweet little old lady had just turned down a lot of money - Dot's game was coming to mind.
Round three: Joan, box 9 - £35,000. Mark, box 11 - £500. Suzanne, box 1 - £1. The board now contained six blues against five reds. Often the offer at this point has been the highest amount of the day. Noel organised for cups of tea rather than the big mugs and then asked how she would feel about the Banker sticking because he loved her? June looked astonished, 'well I would be disappointed, if he loved me he would give me his all'. The offer was £14,000. Buzz thought she should deal, so did a few of the others. 'I'm ready, I think I will do the sensible thing', said June, signalling that she would deal. I thought this was fine because I hate old ladies getting mugged. But Noel was surprised, he said 'really?'. June immediately reverted, 'oh go on then, we'll give it another go...No deal'. The audience applauded, she said 'what have I done?', but no-one asked what had Noel done?
Round four: Buzz, box 3 - £1000 - a red from 'the blue bottle', surely Stevie would be blue today. Jo, box 4 - £10,000. I was shouting at the TV 'go to Stevie', but she went to Teresa, box 19. After the break, with Noel crouched in front of the box with fingers crossed (as well he might be) Teresa lifted the lid on 10p - and the studio cheered. The board now contained five blues against £250,000, £75,000 and £50,000. The offer now was £23,000. 'I think thats pretty good walking money don't you?', the contestants all said deal except Janie, who suggested that she only had to take out one blue for the next offer to be even higher. But June was persuaded by the other 20 contestants - she said 'Deal'. Phew! The single persons' pension in this country is about £100 a week, June had just won over 4 years worth.
Round five: Janie opened box 10 - £50,000. Scott, box 22 - £250. June needed to see the big one, she selected the gorgeous Becca, box 14 - £250,000 and then June clapped and shrieked and said in best accent, 'oh marvellous'. The banker's offer was now - £7000 - she was surprised, she expected it to be higher. What would you have done now June? asked Noel. 'I've already decided' said June, astonished at the stupidity of the question, 'I've taken the £23,000'. Noel was completely captivated by her.
Round six: 'Lets just pretend that you haven't dealt yet' said Noel, trying to keep June abreast of what they were doing. June elected to go for Stevie on the basis that she couldn't possibly have another red, and because Buzz had a red earlier, I agreed with her. Stevie opened box 12 - £75,000 - 'I don't believe it', she said, straight from One Foot in the Grave. You and me both June, I'm very glad you weren't listening to me. She continued to select boxes, Nessie, box 1 - £50,and finally Fran, box 16 - £10. The offer would have been £2.00 and a copy of the rules. Noel was conducting everyone through the scenario as if June had kept going, he was attempting concern but it was clear that Noel was as delighted as June that she had won a decent amount of money.
With two boxes left, Noel opened June's to reveal 50p - Carlton, who was now off ill, had £5 in box 6.
This was DOND at its best, an episode that left you with a feel-good glow. June had played the game without any real idea of where she was or what she was doing but somehow she had managed to play a near perfect game, dealing at exactly the right point. It was June's lovely, warm personality, and the spirit of friendship amongst the whole team that made it such a great show, she was just a delight and it was clear that she was well-loved by the contestants she was leaving behind.
June won £23,000
