(Audience applauses). Jeremy walks onto the stage.
Jeremy: Welcome to the Jeremy Kyle show, I’m Jeremy Kyle. Today on the show we have a story about cheating, lies and deceit, and that’s since leaving the cabinet, please welcome my first guest, Cherie Blair!
(Audience applauses). Cherie walks onto the stage, sits on a chair and Jeremy joins her on the other chair. Even though she is upset and crying, she cannot stop smiling.
Jeremy: Welcome to the show Cherie, let’s cut to the chase, you found that your husband was cheating on you.
Cherie: Yes, I, I thought he was going to an important meeting in America called G8, but it turned out to be a speed dating service for world leaders, G8 Speed date.
(Audience stirs). Tony bursts onto the stage. Jeremy gets up and stands towards the pair.
Tony: I told you nothing happened, we went for a walk, had lunch, but nothing happened.
Jeremy: My researchers tell me something did happen, so Tony, why don’t you tell Cherie what did happen.
Tony: I cannot prove, or disprove this allegation, It’s wheth…
Cherie: Give it a rest Tony; you’re not the bloody prime minister any more, just tell me.
Tony: Ok, ok, we met at the G8 summit, and again when we met at camp David.
A man Struts onto the stage, obviously gay.
Man: An’ I’m camp David, I introduced Tony to his date.
Cherie grabs David by the collar and threatens him.
Cherie: Who is she.
David: I, I can’t tell you wh...
Cherie: WHO IS SHE!
Tony: IT’S NOT A SHE… IT’S A HE!
(Audience reacts).
David: And here he is, George Bush.
As David calls Bush’s name he walks onto the stage, he walks straight to Tony, moves the chair closer and they hold hands.
Jeremy: I didn’t see this coming.
Tony: What do you mean you didn’t see this coming, the world’s media and his wife accused me of being in bed with George, and I was, I’ve come out of the cabinet and out of the closet, I love you Bush!
George: I love you Blair!
Tony and George hug, the camera pans to Jeremy and he looks in shock at the two, he shakes it off and turns to the camera.
Jeremy: Are you a world leader and having problems at home, call me on 0800 it’s 30 40 50.
