This is a sketch I've been writing for awhile - I'm trying to create a couple of characters here - you may have seen bits of this in my other "offerings" hither and thither!
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INT. COUPLE SAT ON SOFA.

GARY:
It was a cool wedding.. fantastic honeymoon and your family have been wonderful.. but when are you going home?

MANDY:
Going home? Don’t be silly, I’m your WIFE now! Like your mum was to your dad!

GARY:
God, but she was THERE all the time... ‘til dad shot her, er GOT shot of her.. well, I mean..

MANDY:
But it was an accident wasn’t it?

GARY:
Yeah, mom had no business having the barrel up there in the first place!

MANDY:
You don’t own a gun do you?

GARY (EVASIVE):
Not exactly..

PHONE RINGS. GARY ANSWERS.

GARY (TENSE):
No, it’s GARY Pride.. g-a-R-y.. OK?

GARY SLAMS THE PHONE DOWN AND KNOCKS IT OFF THE COFFEE TABLE. MANDY GETS UP AND PICKS UP THE PHONE.

MANDY (CONCERNED):
What’s WRONG darling, who was it..

GARY:
Those bleedin' nancy boys agai- ..er, I mean well ..wrong number..

MANDY:
Gary, you mustn’t swear so much and say horrid things about gay people..

GARY CLENCHES HIS FISTS, PUNCHES HIS PALM AND PULLS A FACE.

MANDY (SNUGGLES UP):
Oh Gary, I'm so happy and comfortable with you, I love it when we do things together...

GARY (BRIGHTENS SLIGHTLY):
Yeah, me too, but it's nice to have a space to do some things on your own..

MANDY:
I can't think of anything that I'd rather do on my own than do it together!

GARY:
We-e-ll, maybe.. but..

MANDY:
Honestly, I like shopping with you, going to the pub with you, cooking together, decorating the house, even going to work in the morning together... go on, admit it you're just the same! We're a perfect team! Real love-birds! Soul-mates!

GARY:
Maybe, but... you still need some space to... I mean...

MANDY:
Well, what?

GARY (TURNS TO MANDY WITH REAL LOVING GENTLE CONCERN):
Well, f’r instance, I don't want you there when I’m with a prozzie now do I!