I thought i'd give my own fic a try, please let me know what you think.

Well here goes!!


Chapter 1


"Oh its you", John Paul said as he opened the door to a nervous looking Craig. "Don't be like that", Craig replied looking at John Paul full of sorrow. "Two days Craig, its been two days", John Paul shouted a bit too loud causing Michaela to come over to see what was going on. She walked over and seeing it was Craig she half smiled and thought she'd go out to give them some privacy. She picked up her coat "I'm just going to Amy's" she said as she squeezed past John Paul then Craig as she exited the McQueen house. Craig had kept his head down as Michaela brushed past him, not sure of what her reaction to him being there would be, given the events of two days ago.
Once Michaela had gone Craig looked back to John Paul "Can i come in" he asked hopefully. John Paul walked back in the house allowing Craig to follow. Once inside Craig closed the door behind him and made his way to a nervously waiting John Paul. John Paul had been waiting for this moment for two days and now that it had finally come he wasn't sure how to handle it. He'd tried to phone Craig since it happened but his phone had been off constantly and he hadn't had any delivery reports from his texts either so he mustn't have switched his phone on at all in two days. John Paul had tried his house phone but got fobbed off with lame excuses each time.
But now Craig was here and John Paul wasn't so sure he really wanted to know the answers to the questions he so desperately wanted to ask.
"Look John Paul" Craig said eventually "I'm really sorry for not getting in touch sooner, its just i needed a bit of time on my own to get my head around things, its not an excuse, i just couldn't handle seeing anyone." He went on "Today is the first time i've left my room in two days, i had to see you, i've been thinking of you none stop, your the only person i wanted to see." John Paul just stood there with his arms wrapped around his middle as if protecting himself for whatever Craig had to say. He listened as Craig went on, "I just couldn't face anyone, i was so shocked from what happened the other day, i mean what i did the other day".
With that they both stood there in silence while the thoughts of two days ago crept back into their minds, that was the moment when everything changed.


Please let me know what you think.

Chapter 2- Two days ago


It was Thursday night and Darren had arranged a Mr & Mrs contest in The Dog, it was turning out to be quite a success, the Dog was packed. Craig, John Paul and Sarah were sitting at a table drinking pints, when Sarah decided it would be fun to enter her and Craig in the contest. Craig reluctantly agreed as he knew he wasn’t going to get out of it so Sarah went over to Darren to put their names down.

Whilst the boys had been left alone for a few minutes Craig took this opportunity to speak to John Paul,
“Are you ok with me entering this with Sarah, its just I don’t want you to think I’m rubbing your nose in it” Craig asked John Paul quietly, “I’m just surprised Craig, I didn’t think you’d get involved with one of Darrens games” John Paul replied honestly. “ What have I let myself in for”, Craig thought when the reality of what he was doing sank in. John Paul just laughed, “Yep your going to look like a complete fool”. Craig looked serious for a moment “You really will be ok with this won’t you”, he asked looking straight into John Pauls eyes, touching his hand gently whist saying it, “its fine… really, its just a game it doesn’t mean anything” John Paul replied putting his hand on top of Craigs.

They could see Sarah heading back to the table with a slight smirk on her face, she was looking really proud of herself. “What’s the matter with you” Craig asked as she approached still smiling, “Well I hope you don’t mind John Paul” Sarah said “Its just I didn’t want you sitting here by yourself while me and Craig were playing the game….. So” she said in a mischievous tone “ Spike was just sitting having a pint, he’s not long finished doing a set, so I’d asked if he’d mind being your partner…..just for the game of course, he said it sounded like a laugh and as long as you were ok with it… please John Paul please” came Sarahs pleading. John Paul looked at Craig who looked really uncomfortable with it, then back at Sarah “Ok… sure” he said looking defeated, “but don’t get any ideas about me and Spike” he added. Sarah was so happy and pleased with herself , she didn’t notice Craig giving her evil looks.

The contest was starting and Darren introduced the contestants , “Right first of our Mr and Mrs teams” he announced “Jake and Nancy” Jake and Nancy stepped onto the stage, “second team… Mercedes and Russ” Mercedes and Russ stepped on to the stage, “right now our third team…Craig and Sarah” they stepped onto the stage, “and last but not least…our fourth team…John Paul and Spike” they stepped onto the stage and Darren then added “out fourth team are Mr & Mr, not Mr & Mrs” John Paul and Spike just looked at each other.

“Right round 1” Darren announced, “right this round is called blowing up the balloon, the boys will sit on the chairs and the girls will have to pump up and down on the balloon pump between the boys legs….does everyone know what they’re doing” Darren asked, to which he got everyone one shouting “Yes”. John Paul and Spike decided that John Paul would do the women part, so all the contestants got ready for the game to begin. Darren blew the whistle and the game began. John Paul and Spike took an early lead which didn’t surprise anyone, they were closely followed by Mercedes and Russ, then Craig and Sarah and then Jake and Nancy. The first balloon to burst was John Pauls and Spikes, they jumped up and hugged at winning the first game which didn’t go unnoticed by Craig. Next was Mercedes and Russ, Sarah and Craig, Nancy and Jake just gave up they knew they were obviously out after the first round.

“Sorry but we have to lose Jake and Nancy” Darren said “ anyway…round 2”. “Right this round is called identify your lovers lips”, this made Craig and John Paul squirm a bit. “right all the lads will be blindfolded and the girls will have to kiss each lad, then the lad will have to say which girl is his” Darren said rather excited by this round. “Ok girl 1, would you like to kiss the 3 lads”, Mercedes was the first girl, she walked over to Craig and kissed him, then she kissed Russ then finally spike. Then it was Sarah’s turn, she kissed Craig and he smiled, he knew it was Sarah and felt pleased with himself, then she kissed Russ then Spike. Finally it was John Paul’s turn, he felt really nervous he knew it was just a game but this was going to be the first time he’d kissed Craig in public and he couldn’t help but feel a bit excited. He stepped towards Russ first this felt weird, he was his brother in-law, then he kissed Spike, which Spike instantly smiled, then it was time for Craig, John Paul kissed him, Craig felt so excited he knew it was John Paul and he really didn’t want this kiss to ever stop, it was so loving, so tender but then it was over and John Paul stood back with the girls, feeling quite pleased with the response he’d got from Craig, its wasn’t obvious but he felt it. Darren walked back onto the stage,” right lads can you tell which were your lovers lips”, “Craig your answer please” Darren said “ Craig briefly looked at John Paul then said “girl 2”, “Russ your answer” Darren asked “girl 2” he said, at that moment merceds looked like she was going to hit him, but Darren quickly said “Spike your answer” to which he got “John Paul definitely number 3” John Paul just smiled. Darren then announced that Russ and Mercedes were out.


“Final round everyone” Darren said, “right in this round we will ask the contestants a question each, Craig will have to answer one on Sarah and vice versa, the same applys to Spike and John Paul.” “Right Craig, what is Sarah’s favourite part of herself?” Sarah whispered the answer to Darren, then Darren asked Craig for his answer, “her legs”, Craig asked, “no sorry, it was her hair”. Craig thought to himself ‘her hair that’s so obvious, girls always like there hair’. Next it was Sarah’s turn, it was the same question but about Craig, she thought about it then answered “his humour”, “you mean lack of it” Darren announced, to which everyone laughed. “Anyway Sarah that is the wrong answer” Darren said, John Paul thought to himself ‘ its his eyes Craig loves his eyes’, then Darren announced “its his eyes Sarah…. Don’t you know anything about each other”. “Right John Paul and Spike you only need to answer one question correctly to win” claimed Darren, “right I’d like to know from you Spike, where is John Paul most ticklelish”, “ that’s easy” said spike so surely “its the base of his spine”, “correct…we have our winners” he said grabbing one of each boys arms and pulling them in the air. Craig looked, spike wasn’t the only one to know that answer.

After when Darren told them what they’d won (his and hers dressing gowns, towels and mugs), Spike walked up to John Paul and grabbed him, planting his lips straight on John Paul’s. John Paul was shocked he just stood there, whist Craig on the other hand wasn’t very impressed. It was like slow motion, he pushed past Sarah and everyone in his way, they all just stood and watched in amazement, he then walked straight up to Spike and John Paul, he grabbed Spike, pulled him around and shouted “GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BOYFRIEND” then he hit him so hard he fell to the floor. Craig then turned to John Paul, “how could you do this to me, I thought you loved me…. You said you loved me”, with that Craig ran to the door of the flat, John Paul shouted after him, “its wasn’t me, he kissed me Craig”, with that Craig was gone.

Ok we’re still at two days ago, the events after Craig walked out.

Chapter 3


John Paul was left standing there frightened to move as all eyes were transfixed on him, all of a sudden he felt an almighty slap across his face, he looked up to find a really upset but angry Sarah standing in front of him. All he could do was look, he felt really ashamed that he’d hurt his friend this way, however he’d always knew if and when it all came out there would be a bad fall out, I mean how could there not be!!.

Sarah just stood there in front of him, still taking in the events of the last few minutes, he noticed her face was pale and her mascara was half way down her cheeks, she was completely broken. “Your supposed to be my friend”, she said eventually, John Paul looked into her painful eyes, “I’m so sorry Sarah…I I I didn’t mean for any of this to happen”, he then felt suddenly even more ashamed, as that wasn’t exactly true, he’d wanted Craig to finish with Sarah for so long now, he wanted him to be exclusively his, he couldn’t bare sharing him with Sarah, but he never wanted it all to come out like this. Sarah shuffled around a bit in front of John Paul before asking “How long?…how long John Paul?”, at this point Spike who’d picked himself up off the floor came closer, also wanting to know the answer. John Paul glanced at Spike briefly as he knew this would hurt him as well, he then looked down at the floor and muttered “four months”, he glanced back up briefly to take in their reactions, “four months…four months” came Sarah’s reply, then John Paul felt himself been pulled around slightly til he was face to face with Spike.

“Well now I know… don’t I John Paul, oh yes, I know exactly why it couldn’t work between us now, don’t I” he said raising his voice, he continued “ all this time I thought I’d done something wrong, I thought I wasn’t good enough for you, but now… I definitely know why… you we’re seeing him behind my back for months” he said raging at John Paul. Just then Sarah butted in “oh my god, I didn’t even think of that, you been having sleeping with my boyfriend… doing disgusting things with my boyfriend”, she seethed “all this time when he’s been sleeping with me…” she said in disgust, John Paul shot her a look, he was dying to say something about her last remarks but he knew what he and Craig had done was far worse than a few comments made by someone who was truly in pain, so he just waited til Spike and Sarah were finished ranting at him.

Sarah calmed down slightly, she was just looking hurt and confused now “why” she asked calmly “why would you do this to me”, his answer came so easily, “because I love him” he replied honestly, Spike then asked “yeah but does he love you…I mean where is he now, he’s left you here on your own to deal with all this by yourself”, John Paul quickly said defensively “Yes he loves me…I know he does”, he wondered who he was really trying to convince them or himself, he knew he for a fact the only person he’d loved truly was Craig but as much as Craig tried to assure him he was never one hundred percent sure whether Craig truly loved him.

Sarah had been getting all wound up again over all this love talk, when she suddenly lunged at John Paul “he doesn’t love you, he doesn’t” she said almost sorrowful as she pounded at John Paul’s chest. Spike and Jake, who had been listening to everything and decided to help defuse the situation, walked up to Sarah and pulled her off John Paul, Sarah allowed herself to be pulled away and quickly found some support in the comforting arms of Nancy, who was still in shock herself, Sarah broke down sobbing in Nancy’s arms with Nancy shushing her telling her it would all be ok.

Then Jake turned to John Paul, he couldn’t look him in the eye, it felt too weird for Jake, everything that had just been said, he couldn’t really take any of it in, this couldn’t have been happening not with his brother!. Jake then motioned to John Paul “I think you’d better just go… I think enough damage has been done for one day”, John Paul looked around uncomfortably still seeing everyone’s eyes on him, he stepped backwards then turned around feeling all the stares on his back as he headed for the door, as he was about to open the door to leave Frankie and Jack walked in, “Oh hi John Paul” Frankie smiled as she nearly walked straight in to him, John Paul could only give a brief smile as he squeezed past her then Jack as he exited the pub. Once outside he felt himself welling up and knew he had to get home before he completely broke down.

“What’s the matter with you lot” Frankie asked noticing all the looks of shock on the faces in the pub. Darren quickly piped up “Not a lot… just your precious Craig announced to everyone, he’s more or less gay, and has been sleeping with John Paul” he said sarcastically “I told everyone but would you listen….noooo” he said proudly, “shut up you idiot” came Jack’s reply, out of everyone he thought, why did he have to have the insensitive git for a son.


Please post some comments, i'd like to know what you think

I read this on Fanatasy Hollyoaks i'm JP4Craig over there and this fic is amazin continue soon xxx

quote:

Originally posted by Sweet Candy:
I read this on Fanatasy Hollyoaks i'm JP4Craig over there and this fic is amazin continue soon xxx

thanx, well at least someones reading it..LOL...

Wow!!! this is amazin!!! please write more!!!!!!!!!!

This part will be in two chapters, one Craig and the other John Paul. These chapters are leading up to present situation in chapter 1


Chapter 4 - Craig


It had been an hour since Craig had walked out, and now he sat in his room staring at the photo’s on his bedside cabinet, one of him and Sarah and the one him and John Paul, he knew which one was receiving the most attention. He couldn’t cry no more, his tears had completely dried up as they hadn’t barely stopped since the minute he walked through the door to the flat. He’d been able to hear the raised voices of Sarah and Spike attacking John Paul as he’d sat motionless in his room. He did feel guilty walking off and leaving John Paul to deal with the consequences, but he just couldn’t handle it himself.

He thought back to what had happened, one minute he was standing there with Sarah their backs to John Paul and Spike, Sarah was devastated that Spike and John Paul had beaten them, as they weren’t even a couple anymore, Craig was more pissed off because John Paul seemed to enjoy playing this game with Spike, a bit too much for his liking. That’s when Craig turned round and saw Spike kiss John Paul, it came as a massive blow to Craig, ‘this can’t be happening’, he thought as he found himself moving towards the kissing couple in slow motion. At that moment his anger took over as he grabbed Spike off John Paul, ‘his John Paul’, he didn’t even realised he’d hit him until Spike was on the floor. He remembered the look in John Paul’s eyes as he said those final words before storming out, he looked devastated. Craig had heard John Paul shouting after him but his mind was all over the place, he just had to get out.

Craig had switched his phone off he knew John Paul would phone him and he couldn’t face him at the moment, he knew it was selfish and he and Sarah would be in a state as well, but he needed this time on his own.

It had been two hours when Frankie decided he’d had enough time now and thought she’d try and talk to him, but to no avail, he had simply told her he didn’t want to speak to anyone and that included her as well. Frankie felt useless her baby boy, was all cut up and she couldn’t do anything to help, not that she would have known what to do, she still couldn’t get her head around any of this at all, I mean how could she have missed the signs, sure John Paul and Craig were close but aren’t all mates!! She thought to herself. She decided just to leave him alone and he’d talk to her when he was ready.

Craig had been locked in his room for the best part of two days now, the only times he’d left was to go to the bathroom. Everything had been going round and round in his head, he knew he was going to have to pull himself together, he was getting a bit sick of hiding away, and it wasn’t really helping sort anything out either, he was still confused, ‘why had John Paul kissed Spike‘ he kept thinking, John Paul had assured Craig that there was nothing going on between him and his ex now, he knew how insecure Craig was and to do this to him was just so hurtful. He felt the tears welling up in his eyes again, just thinking of John Paul hurt so bad.

There was a knock at his bedroom door, “go away” he seethed “I told you I didn’t want to speak to anyone” just assuming it was one of the family trying again. Then he received the shock of his life when he heard, “ Craig look its Spike… I I I just want to…”, he was cut off by an angry Craig “what do you want, you’ve got some nerve coming round here” he snapped back at Spike. Spike sat down outside Craig’s door, he was here to say something and wasn’t leaving until it was done.

Spike started to talk, “Look Craig, John Paul is in a hell of a state”, typical Craig thought, Spike would going running to John Paul, try to weedle his way back in whilst I’m out of the picture. “Craig are you listening to me” came the sudden voice from the other side of the door interrupting Craig‘s thoughts, “I haven’t got much choice, have I”, was the quick reply. So Spike went on “I was really hurt on Thursday night, once I found out what had been going on… you know between you two, anyway I went round to see John Paul yesterday to get some answers from him…and I couldn’t believe the state he was in when I got there”, Craig was listening carefully now, “ I had all intensions of having another go at him, but when I saw him, he looked completely broken”. Spike went on to tell him how John Paul had said how sorry he was and he didn’t set out to hurt him or Sarah, he explained that, that’s why he’d finished with Spike. “this bit you need to listen to Craig” Spike said to raise the importance, “ he thinks he’s lost you, because of that kiss…he thinks you think that he wanted it as much as me… but Craig I can assure you that’s not the case” Spike explained “Just before you grabbed me, I knew I’d made a mistake kissing him…he was pulling away, and was pushing me away from him. I sensed the panic coming from him…but then you grabbed me, then everything else happened”. Craig smiled slightly, he’d known deep down John Paul would never have hurt him on purpose. Spike then said “ As much as it pains me to say he definitely loves you…I know he does, he even told me so yesterday…and considering you’ve sat in here for the last two days in a state, I would say the feeling is mutual.” Craig was smiling now, then Spike said “right I’ve done as much as I can, the rest is up to you…don’t throw it away Craig, loves hard to find”. Then Craig heard Spike get up and head away from his room. Craig new what he had to do, so he quickly started getting ready, grabbed his phone, shot out of his room, to the look of his surprised family and straight out The Dog, he knew where he had to be and his feet couldn’t take him fast enough.

Ok i don't think anyones reading my fic, i'll post the next bit anyway

Right this is the last flash back, we’ll be back with the present after this. Hope it hasn’t dragged on too much

Chapter 5 - John Paul


John Paul was glad he was nearly home, he wanted nothing more than to curl up in the comfort of his own bed, to be in the relaxing atmosphere of his own room. Once at his front door, he opened it as quietly as possible hoping that whichever of his mass of family members were in the living room wouldn’t here him come in. He stepped through the front door, turned and closed the door behind him, still trying not to make a sound. He glanced round the room noticing only his mother was in, and started for the stairs. Then he heard a voice “oh, hi love” , he turned to look at his mum and half smiled, Myra could see the state he was in, she looked straight into his eyes, which looked so full of grief “You ok sweetheart” she quizzed, “Fine mum” came the vague reply “I just need to be alone right now”, this wasn‘t necessarily true because really the only thing he wanted right now was to wrapped up in Craig’s loving arms with the assurance everything was going to be ok. Myra smiled a pity smile at her delicate son as he wondered off upstairs.

He got to his bed and the tears started to flow, he shoved off his shoes and lay back, his hands were running wild through his hair as his emotions were getting too much for him. He moved to the centre of his bed and pulled his legs up until he was lying on his side in the foetal position, his arms wrapped around his middle tightly trying to comfort himself. As he lay there he wanted nothing more than to hear Craig’s voice, then the thoughts crept into his head, ‘You’re an idiot John Paul, he thinks you’ve cheated on him, he certainly won’t want you back now’ when this thought struck him his sobbing increased. He picked up his phone and was pondering whether to phone Craig, when before he realised he’d already pressed his speed dial number, ‘his subconscious must have been telling him something’ he thought. However John Paul realised, whenever he’d tried constantly for an hour, Craig’s phone must be switched off, when it kept going straight to his answering machine. He’d sent him loads of messages begging him to get in touch, he even left a voicemail, but Craig obviously didn’t want to know, this completely disheartened John Paul.

He woke to a slight tapping on the door “just me love…I brought you a cuppa and a sandwich” Myra said whilst opening the door. “Thanks mum” John Paul mumbled as he watched her placing them on his chest of drawers. She turned to look at her son he looked terrible, his eyes were all red and puffy caused through hours of constant sobbing. He looked completely drained, the pain and misery were so obvious, she sat beside him and he fell into her arms and she embraced him like any mother would. After a brief time he pulled away and looked at her, “Do you want to talk?” his mum asked with concern, “not really” he sighed, “it’s ok love… in your own time” she said sympathetically, “you can tell me about Craig when your ready” she said cautiously so he’d know she knew. He gave her an uncertain look, ‘how did she know?’, then it hit him, of course she’d know the whole bloody village would know, they’d all be judging him by now!!. Myra got up to vacate the room, she turned back to her son and smiled shyly, he just about managed a half smile back, then she left the room.

It was now Friday afternoon and John Paul had tried Craig’s phone for what seemed like the millionth time, but to no avail. He’d tried his house phone but Craig’s family made excuses for him. Its useless John Paul told himself, Craig obviously doesn’t want to know, he’d blown the only thing he ever wanted all because of a stupid game. This wasn’t Spike’s fault though, it was all his fault, John Paul’s fault, he punished himself, he must have lead Spike on, made him think there was a chance for them. Not only had he hurt Spike and Sarah but he was convinced he’d ruined any chance he’d had with the one person he truly loved, Craig Dean. His heart was breaking and he couldn’t see anyway out.

He heard the knock at his door, he yanked it open and yelled “WHAT NOW”, much to his embarrassment, he was expecting one of his sisters as they’d been constantly pestering him, but there stood his first boyfriend Spike looking concerned. John Paul starting sobbing hysterically while Spike pulled him into a hug. John Paul went with it for a moment, before realising this is the exact same kind of thing that caused him to lose Craig, he then pulled away rapidly, leaving them both feeling uncomfortable.
Spike had come round for answers but seeing John Paul like this he couldn’t help empathising with him. He looked so lost and broken, Spike had no idea what to say. Spike moved closer to John Paul and was about to speak when John Paul spoke “I’m so sorry Spike… I didn’t mean to hurt you or Sarah, I didn’t want you to find out like that”, he said almost talking to the floor, “ I know” Spike sighed quietly. Spike then added “did you ever love me?” waiting nervously for the answer, “yeah…I did, I mean I still do kind of…just not”, “in the way you love him” Spike finished John Paul’s sentence. “Yeah…I’m sorry” John Paul whispered running his hands though his hair. “I can’t help it… I love him, its always been him and its killing me right now that I’ll never touch him again” he trailed off. He looked to the floor realising this was probably hurting Spike right now, he knew it wasn’t easy hearing the person you love, loves someone else.

“So go get him” Spike said surprisingly, “I can’t, he doesn’t want me…his phones been off and he won’t speak to me on the house phone either…he thinks I’ve cheated on him Spike and that’s unforgivable in Craig’s eyes…everyone one Craig has ever loved has hurt him and now he thinks I’ve done it to”, “but I kissed you”, Spike interrupted “I know but he doesn’t see it like that, does he”, John Paul said getting upset again.

Spike thought he’d go, he couldn’t bare seeing the man of his affections like this anymore, as he was leaving the room he glanced back at John Paul crying and left. John Paul simply curled up on his bed again, he had no intensions of removing himself from this prison he’d created, he was in pain and intended to stay that way.

Spike couldn’t believe he was actually thinking this but he had to make things right as he felt partly responsible, he didn’t think Craig was good enough for John Paul, I mean he’d seen what Craig had put Sarah through in recent months, well saying that he was starting to understand things a lot better now, with recent events clarifying things for him. Whilst pondering what to do he started to ask himself ‘Could Craig actually loves John Paul too‘, at one time he’d of sworn that wasn’t possible, but whilst talking to Jack and Darren recently he’d actually found out Craig was in as much of a mess as John Paul, ‘saying that Craig could be in a mess because of Sarah‘, he thought, but Craig had refused to see her and Spike knew how Craig was in the past with Sarah, he’d always going running to back to her, whatever he’d done and beg her to take him back, but this hadn’t happened this time, “he really mustn’t want her” he muttered a bit loudly, causing a few weird looks. This lead to only one conclusion in Spike’s mind, John Paul’s feelings for Craig were definitely mutual. With this conclusion Spike realised what he had to do, the only problem was would Craig give him the time of day to help fix things!!

oh wow, this is brilliant!

im glad to see a story thats set about a couple weeks ahead of the show and the emotions are spot on.

keep it going mate

More please!

oh I love this fic it is so well written!please carry on more this is my favourite fanfic at the moment !!!!!

thanx for the comments, i'll try my best to keep it interesting for you.


my name is amanda by the way

Right we’re finally caught up, so now back to the awkward situation with Craig and John Paul. I’m a bit nervous about this chapter, its an important chapter and I’m worried I haven’t done it justice.

Anyway, enjoy

Chapter 6


Both boys stood in silence, willing the other to speak. It should have been easy, they’d both been though this moment time and time again in their minds over the last couple of days, they’d known exactly what they’d wanted to say, if they’d got the opportunity. But now it was here and both were too afraid that the other would break their heart.

John Paul broke the ice, “I’d ask if you wanted a cuppa…but I think we both agree we need something a lot stronger”, he walked over to the liquor cabinet and pulled out the bottle of Jack Daniels. He picked up the tumblers and passed one to Craig, he then poured them each a shot, well more like trebles, they certainly needed Dutch courage he thought. They took the drinks to their mouths and began to drink, the JD hit heavy on Craig’s throat and chest and he started to dry cough and couldn’t stop. John Paul quickly started patting Craig on the back, “you ok mate” he said concerned, “yeah, yeah,… went down… the wrong… way,.. that’s all” Craig said in between coughs. Once he’d calmed down John Paul motioned for him to take a seat. ‘Well the ice mightn’t be broken yet, but its certainly starting to melt’ John Paul thought to himself, starting to relax a little around Craig.

They sat holding their tumblers, the silence had crept back in and they could barely look at each other as their nerves took hold again, they stole quick glances at each other and when caught they’d give each other a knowing smile and quickly looked down at the drinks in their hands. John Paul noticed the song playing on the radio in the background, and he smiled, “what?” asked Craig puzzled, “this song it reminds me of you”, John Paul said slightly embarrassed, starting to sing along ‘and your…my brown eyed girl’, “hey” , Craig quickly piped up “girl?” he questioned, “I meant the brown eyes part” John Paul laughed nudging Craig in the side. With that the ice was definitely broke and they started the conversation they’d both been wanting but also dreading.

“You left it for two days Craig, not a phone call, text, anything to let me know you were ok” there was a brief silence then, “I know…I’m sorry”, was all Craig could muster. “Craig you left me to deal with everything on my own… I mean I know it was a shock for you…I was completely in shock too, gob smacked even,”, he paused for a breath then continued “Craig you have to know, I didn’t kiss Spike…he kissed me…I tried to push him away but…”,Craig interrupted “I know John Paul” he said honestly looking straight in to John Paul’s eyes, “what?…I mean how?” John Paul asked surprised “Spike” came Craig’s less than enthusiastic answer. “oh.. right” said John Paul looking back in to his glass. “Yeah, he came round about two hours ago…told me he wasn’t going to leave until I’d heard him out” Craig reminisced, getting slightly agitated just at the thought of Spike, “he explained about the kiss…it was him…not you, he told me you were in a state and that you thought you’d lost me and…”, “Wait one minute” John Paul butted in loudly, “You mean to tell me” he said annoyed “its ok for you to take Spike’s word for it but you didn’t even want to listen to mine… I’m supposed to be the one you trust, the one your supposed to love… and you didn’t want to know, until Spike told you it wasn’t true”. “No, No, No that’s not what I meant…I’m not saying that at all” Craig quickly jumped in, “Not how it sounded to me” John Paul answered bitterly. He necked his drink, reached for the bottle again and poured himself another treble, he glanced at the other glass and noticing Craig hadn’t touched anymore of his, he put the bottle back down.

“Look John Paul…It really wasn’t like that…I already knew you wouldn’t have done that to me, I’d known as soon as I said it and left,…Spike just gave me the nudge I needed… to make me come to my senses that’s all… To tell you the truth, I thought I’d lost you…why would you me back after I accused you of cheating, then hit your ex and ran out leaving you to deal with the whole mess I created”, Craig said feeling more and more guilty by the moment. John Paul could tell Craig had more to get off his chest and thought it would be wise to just listen “go on…I’m listening” he said calmly as he noticed Craig’s eyes starting to fill. “John Paul I know I’ve already said this…but I really am sorry… I’m sorry for the other night the way I hurt you, I just couldn‘t watch him touch you, kiss you it was all too much, you were eventually mine and I couldn‘t handle if he took you away again… I’m sorry for rubbing Sarah in front of your nose…I’m sorry for not telling anyone about us… I’m sorry for making you feel worthless and small the way I spoke to you at times and I’m so sorry that I made you think I didn’t want you…that I made you feel so insecure that you can’t believe me when I say I love you…but I do love you John Paul”, he said taking his hand in one hand and lifting his chin in the other so he could look into them wonderful blue eyes “and I want to be with you, properly… a real relationship, no more running or hiding from my feelings” he said smiling at John Paul “and I promise I will never… ever“ he stated clearly “hurt you again…so what do you say John Paul?” , he asked so sincere.

John Paul shifted awkwardly, Craig noticed and started to panic a little but kept tight hold of his hand “Craig there’s something I have to ask…something I need to know before I can make any kind of decision”, “What is it?…Anything…I’ll tell you anything” Craig declared. John Paul took his hand from Craig’s, he stood up feeling nervous, he really did need to know this but was terrified of the answer. As he stood fidgeting in front of Craig, Craig took hold of his hips “Just spit it ok!” then smiled at him. “Please don’t hate me for asking…its just I really do have to ask”, John Paul stated looking into Craig’s eyes to judge the sincerity of his response, “I need to know that I was your first choice…that you didn’t try to get back with Sarah before seeing me.” Craig jumped up immediately and clasped on to John Paul’s hands, “No…God No… how could you even think that”, he said shocked, well he knew exactly why he could think that, all the broken promises, the amount of times he had run back to Sarah, god he couldn’t even count them on one hand. He looked directly into John Paul’s eyes “I’ve barely thought about her at all in the last few days” his realisation making him feel ashamed, “this has all been about you and me”. John Paul then quietly added, “You do understand why I had to ask, don’t you?…I just need to be sure that you want me for me and not because you can’t have her… you see I’m afraid that you’ll be settling for me and that once reality hits, you’ll leave …I couldn’t bare that because I love far too much”, “John Paul I love you too, with all my heart, I don’t think there’s anything I can really say that will convince you of this…you’ll have to let me prove it to you…and the only way I can do that is if you give us a go…me and you…a proper relationship…yeah”, Craig took John Paul by the hands and looked deep in his eyes, “well then?” he awaited the answer eagerly…John Paul’s smile beamed across his face much to the delight of Craig, they then moved slowly closer together treasuring this moment, Craig moved his hand up and brushed it against John Paul’s cheek the moment was so tender and special they felt the world could have stopped and they would have been oblivious to it, “A proper relationship…yeah?” John Paul whispered just reconfirming Craig’s offer, “Yeah” Craig confirmed as there lips finally for the first time as ‘boyfriends’.

just thought i'd let anyone know who's reading this that the next chapter is over on the darkside, contents were abit too much for here.

oh and if you are reading this please comment

Ok,thought i'd put this shortened version of the naughty fic up, hope you enjoy it

Chapter 7


John Paul pulled away from the kiss, “I think we need to consummate our relationship properly”, he said raising an eyebrow. He flashed Craig a look towards the stairs, Craig smiled knowingly and took John Paul’s hand and led him up. There they were back in the familiar surrounds of John Paul’s room, the amount of time they’d spend in here the last few months, god if the walls could talk, the stories they would tell!! John Paul went and put some music on, Craig couldn’t take his eyes off him, he was dying to have his lips on his again. John Paul turned round and headed back towards Craig, for the first time today he noticed how much of an effort Craig had made when he came to see him, he’d been so nervous earlier, he really didn’t realise that Craig was wearing his new jeans and new black top, which he himself had helped pick, “Thought you were saving them for a special occasion”, John Paul motioned pointing at Craig’s clothes, “This is a special occasion” Craig replied pulling John Paul towards him, John Paul smiled and planted a kiss on Craig’s lips.

The kissing started getting heavier, their lips smacking together passionately, tongues exploring each others mouths, it felt like they’d waited for this moment forever, when realistically it had been only two days. The thought of losing each other had made this moment more urgent, the need at be as close and intimate with each other was the only thing that mattered right now. Craig broke away from the kiss, but kept his eyes fixed on his boyfriends. He pulled John Paul’s t-shirt over his head and placed his hands on his chest, just the feel of John Paul getting him aroused, he then moved on to his jeans, he had to tear his gaze away from John Paul’s eyes for a second because the button on the jeans was stuck. He then fixed his eyes back to John Paul’s. The jeans fell to the ground with ease and they were quickly cast aside, Craig moved his finger round the edging of John Paul’s boxers and gently slid them to the floor. He then stepped back to fully take in the sight of a naked John Paul in front of him ‘perfection’, he thought ‘absolute perfection'. John Paul then stepped towards Craig giving him quick pecks as he was undoing Craig’s few buttons on his top then pulled it over his head. He then pulled at Craig’s belt before releasing the button and pulling the zip down on his jeans which caused them to fall to the ground, within seconds his boxers joined them. They both stood there for a moment gazing at the sight in front of them, just looking at each other naked. Craig put his hand out to John Paul and pulled him close, wrapping his arms around him, just holding him for a time before leading him to the bed.

“Can you stay” John Paul quizzed as they lay on their sides facing each, planting small delicate kisses on each others mouth, Craig ran his hand slowly over John Paul’s cheek then round the back of his neck and pulled him close “I love you” he whispered “I’m not going anywhere… tonight is just me and you” he added before parting his lips and the passionate kissing started.

After they'd finished 'making love' Craig lay on his back with John Paul at his side with his arm draped over him. They kissed passionately then lay with there heads close together on the pillow, "Ilove you" whispered John Paul, "I love you too" Craig replied.