okay, this is my first, sure if its crap just tell me and ill stop, please comment anyway. oh, and im just making this up as i go, so it most likely will be crap. can i just say my fav story on this has benn writen by louise, i just wanted to say that coz ive read all her jp/craig stories and they kept me entertained! thanks! anyway..here goes...

jp sat in the dog, he knew craig had been home for at least a week. Fr. keiran leaned into him "whats up?" he wispered, "you still angry, i thought we talked about it?" jp frowned and said he wasnt angry. fr k and him had been frighting alot lately, oh the same old fight everytime. jp was gettin tired of hiding fr k everytime myra happened to come in unannounced or jumping up everytime someone came home early and then having to think up of excuse after exuse for a reason that fr. k was over to visit...it was all gettin to much. but of course he loved him and was prepared to go trough the motions and concquences and secrets of being with a priest. jp wondered why craig hadnt rang or called over to his. he wondered why he didnt mensioned to fr k that he knew craig was back. he wondered why everytime someone came doen stair from where the osbourns lived he suddenl felt his heart beat fast and his palms get sweaty...

lov it plz continue lov mcdean

PART 2

So, what do you wanna do tonight, the dog? asked Fr K as he and john-paul walked out of the drive n buy. "eh..." said jp, not evening listening as he stared at darren osborne running over to him. "oh god!, what does he think he looks like?" fr. k said as he mistakenly thought jp woz staring at the shiny sliver suit darren was wearing, "another classic" he said laughing and pulling jp arm to lead him on but failing. "no, kiran there's something i have to tell you" he said and decideing that he should just come right out and say it he took a deep breath "see that guy over there" he said nodding awardly towards craig who was also lookin award and determintly not looking at jp and what looked like his boyfriend,"that craig dean."
"craig...." said fr. k confusedly, "should i be shocked or something, is he the village murderer..."he said jokingly, obviously he could do what jp never could and had forgotten all about jp tramatic past, although jp had mensioned him enough time in the very begining of there relashionship.
He was going to have to explain, but Darren had got there before him....

PART 3

Darren came over with a mock smile on his face and a flyer in his hand.
"hey fairy" he said looking at jp and ignoring frank who had taken a step back and though frowning slightly at what darren had called jp, said nothing, much to jp's annoyance. "what do you want darran" said jp through gritted teeth although he still was yearning to hear something of the man who was patiently waiting on the other side of the street. jp didnt know wether to be confused or annoyed or grateful that craig had so much as said hello to him since he came home. it was sad that they apparently couldnt even be friends now. "here" said darren shoving a flyer into frank's hand," an invitation to my step brothers birthday party" he said while slyly looking at jp, "oh but no invited" he said grining at jp and while walking backward away from jp he shouted "your NOT invited john paul, i mean it. my family has been through enough, mams delighted craigs back and your not gonna ruin it for us" he said as he left, "mine dont let a car drive over ya now" jp shouted in mock concern as darren turned to cross the street saftely. as soon as darren reached craig jp could see craig frowning while talkin to him, as soon as he was done craig walked quickly away from him into the pub as darren followed in his wake. "oh, the big ex-boyfriend. cant believe id forgotten the big C word we had finally stopped mensioning..." said keiran a little sarcasticly but inside he was dissappionted, the news of craigs return definatly would explain jps distance and mood swing of late...and the fact he hadnt him made him feel that nomatter how many times jp had assured him that he felt nothing for craig anymore, frank now had doubts...

loved it writemore plz
ope jp goes to craigs b'day n day get bac 2 gether

"Look i didnt think I needed to mension-," shouted jp.
"What? john-paul thats rubbish and you know it!" interupted keiran, john-paul noted that kieran called him john-paul,that was never good, he always called him jp. It was like when they were in public where john-paul always had to remember to call him father, which was really weird...strange. It was like they were strangers and didnt know personal things about eachother at all. jp knew that keiran was right and that he should have told him about craig being home. But he did what he always did these days when they had a row, walked out in a huff. As he walked out he mumbled that he'd talk to him later, slamming the door after him. As he walked out onto the street all he saw was a blurr of blond hair and then books and a person at his feet. "oh, im so sorry, are you all right" he said as he bent down to help the girl up. "yea yea, sorry. i was in a bit of a rush, im late to meet someone and got lost..." she trailed of, talkin aparently more to herself than anyone and not really noticing jp at all. As she started to pick up books and her bag she suddenly stood up and grabbed his arm "hey, you dont know where a restraunt called ill nosh is by any chance do you?"
"yea, its just up that street, ya cant miss it." he said pointing.
"oh, great thanks a million, ive just come off the plane from dublin, my mate from collage just suddenly left and came here and ive been worried out of my mind! he finally he answered my call yesterday so i hurriedly packed some stuff and got on a plane!"
"oh, okay" said jp, a bit surpised that this person was reavealing so much. He did note that she was from dublin and though it was too much of a coincedence...she had to be meetin craig.
"sorry, you must think im crazy, look im going now thanks for your help....?" she said smiling a great big smile waiting somewhat impatiently for him to tell her his name. jp could tell she was a very out going type of girl and if he supposed correctly and she was infact going to see craig dean she didnt seem the type craig would go for. Not that she wasnt good enough or something, it was craig. it was always a girls looks craig went for more than anything, and while this girl was no ugly duckling, she wasnt spectacularly pretty or anything, she was just normal. she had personality, not like sarah barnes. in fact not at all like sarah barnes. Craig always seemed to go for the model type, airheads basically.jp noticed this girl was still waiting for an answer and realised he was just staring at her.
"no, your not crazy" he said in mock sincerity and they both laughed while she threw her bag onto her shoulder and he handed her the books he had helped her pick up. "jp...eh...john-paul" he said smiling and takin in her quick smiled which quickly changed to a suprised look and then back to a smile again. "oh, jp eh?" she said choosing to call him jp instead of jp, like she knew him already.
"Well, i be damned, funny that isnt it? im arwen. We've got the same best friend i think, is your last name mcqueen?" she said excitedly.
jp was extactic for some reason, he had butterflies in his stomach, craigs best friend. he hadnt heard anyone say that in a while. why had such a small thing made him feel so happy. "so, have ye caught up with eachother? when i met him first he was always talkin about jp! jp this and jp that and how much he miss ya!but finally he got over the homesickness and started to enjoy himself, we shared a house. why did he leave, did he tell you? he said he wouldnt tell me until i got here, he said i had to go to this party! do you wanna come with me to meet him?" she said all in the same breath and started to walk as if jp had said yes. he laughed at her enthusuasim but said "no, look i have to go...meet someone...someone else" he said, it was all he could say.
"right, sure im sure we'll meet agian soon, oh and dont think im crazy, im really not, now i am soooo late so i'll see ya|" she said laughing as she walked off. as jp walked in the opposite direction, back to naill and kirean's flat, he though how nice she seemed. she was obviously a good friend if she was so worried as to why craig had left so suddenly- and she obviouly had had to take some time off from collage to come meet him here....but why did craig leave?

do more soon

Please do more soon. It's brilliant.

Thanks for the nice comments guys, here's more. Its the beginning, but from craigs perspective...

Part 5 CRAIG
As craig sat in the darkness of his dublin flat holding an unopened letter, he thought about what he thought about most, well almost as much as one other thing, returning to hollyoaks. He knew what was in the envelope, he knew what it would say. he had got three previous letters which said the same. Except this would be the last one bar the one that would say he had been expelled form the collage. craig didnt want to wait around for that one. But he also didnt want to go back to hollyoaks. There was only one reason why, but it was a big enough one. it was the thing he thought most of while her in dublin. the person he most wanted to see and talk to, but couldnt. He tore the letter and threw it into the bin, grabbed his glass and emptyed it and poured another glass of vodka for himself. he worried about his drinking, he found he was drunk every night and woke up with a banging head ache which always helped in his decision not to go into collage. as he took a long slug the embarressment of last night came back to him. Arwen, his best friend here in dublin and the person who he shared a flat with, had a friend who was gay. craig had decided one night that he was going to pretend that he would let him, finn, drag him to a gay bar seeing as finn went whereever he and arwen wanted to go to everyother night. But secretly it was all part of craig's plan. He had decided to get really drunk and find out once and for all if he was really gay or if it was just john-paul he loved. if he ended up with someone and enjoyed it, he would know. he didnt know what he was going to do if he did. he was worried about letting himself think about that yet, he would wait and see. when they arrived at the bar, craig bought lots of shots for them to do, but soon arwen and finn got bored and left. they told craig that they would meet him back here, seeing as he didnt want to leave, and get a taxi home together. finn and arwen wondered why craig wanted to stay, seeing as they had dragged him here in the first place but they supposed he was too drunk these days to realised where he was. arwen was really starting to worry about him. When craig saw them leave he went up to the bar and decided that the first person up to the bar he would get with. not too long after he got up, a black haired guy came up and smiled at him, craig offered him a drink and they started chatting. craig was talking very incoherently, the guy, (jack) couldnt really understand him so he leaned in and craig kissed him. craig had his eyes open, as he was kissing him he thought to himself. he told himself to enjoy it, to try. but he wasnt. he felt the stubble on jack face. enjoy it, he thought. he was kissing a man. enjoy it. he wasnt, he couldnt, he was uncomfortable. he decided to close his eyes. he did. enjoy it, he thought. he knew he wasnt. he didnt like it at all. suddenly someone else popped into his head. the one he wanted to kiss. he started to really enjoy the kiss, he loved it. he had wanted this for so long, he brought up his hand to the mans cheek and pulled in closer, tighter. he ran his hand through the familar blond hair, he ould even smell that old familar odor, he felt safe and warm, like he was home. but suddenly the other man pulled back and craig opened his eyes. For a second he didnt know where he was.
"who the hell is jp" jack said laughing.
"what? I have to go" craig had said and ran out the door.
craig was embaressed as he rememered, all in all he didnt find out anything he didnt know already. as he drank another glass of vodka he decided he wanted to leave, he was miserable here, even if he went back to hollyoaks it didnt mean hed even have to talk to jp, he's go his own way and jp could continue doing watever it was he was doing now. hes probably moved on, probably has a new boyfriend, he thought miserably. he could ignore him, he could. anyway, he had to go back, he had no choice. He had no money. His mam already had put enough in his accont for the plane home. he drunkenly grabbed his bagpack and packed the bare essentials, didnt bother leaving a note for arwen. better that way he thought. he'd just leave, leave the life he tried so hard to live, he had made an effort to be happy but the effort it took, took too much out of him. he needed him to be happy. it scared him that somebody could have that effect on him, so he chose not to believe it. he was drunk. being drunk always made craig think stupid depressing thoughts. he'd be fine once he sobered up a bit and got home to his family, jack, his mum, steph, jake and charlie-even darren.

This fic is great!
continue soon!

PART 6 CRAIG

Criag woke up as the plane landed. he hated this part, it made him feel like he was crash landing, bump bump bump...to a place he didnt want to be. he had a blinding head ache, he unbockled his seatbelt and pulling his snowflake cardigan tighter round him and putting his scarf around him neck, almost hiding half his face in the process he got up to go. As he went through the airport he saw jack, he had come to meet him, his mother had to stay at home to mind charlie- a new revelation to craig. secretly he felt his mother was too attached to charlie and that nancy had more of a right to look after him, seeing as it turned out that he was not really jake son. craig was ashamed of feeling a bit releaved that jake was in hospital, as he wouldnt have to see jake's disgust at him, or listen to his questions. Questions. thats what craig dreaded....he knew he'd get them. why are you back? it isnt because of him is it? he knew by looking at jack, who had finally spotted him in the crowd of people getting off the plane, that he would have questions.
"hey son" jack said as he came up to him and gave him a big bear hug.
jack noticed at once craigs desheveled appearance. he looked like he hadnt gotten a good nights kip in the year that he was gone! he had black under his eyes, and he smelled like the pub. jack hoped he hadnt been kicked out of collage. craig hardly ever rang and whenever jack had managed to get a hold of him, getting any infortion out of craig was like pulling teeth.
"so, how you been, to what do we own this great pleasure in seeing you?" he said smiling at craig while takin his bagpack and walking with craig towards the carpark outside.
"ah, you know. missed yis!" craig said somewhat evasivly.
"Craig, are you not ment to be studying for these exams or have you got it all covered?"
"All covered" craig said,"thats why im home, i'll go back when the exams start" he finished, as he open the car door. he hated lying to jack, who was a better father than his biological father ever was. hell, he was probably closer to jack than his own mother. If he could have told anyone the reason he had to come home he probably would tell jack quicker than his mother. he always felt his mother was highly strung and easily upset. he hated upsetting his mam, god knows, he did enough of that the year before he left.
"so, how long you home for" jack said as he closed his door and out on his seat belt and started to drive home.
"couple of weeks..." craig said as he prepared himself mentally for being back in hollyoaks, prepared toself to be able to see him again and not run over to him and kiss him. prepared himself to be distant towards him. How i will be at the start will determine how i'll be the whole time i spend in hollyoaks, he thought. Be distant then figure out what the hell you wanna do and then leave, he thought.
"Craig!" jack shouted.
"what?!" craig said as he jumped
"your in a world of your own, i said i wanna talk about what you wont" he said, giving craig a look.
"look, can we just forget about last year jack, it was a mistake, ive grown up a lot since then.
"okay" said jack, not really sure he understood what that ment, so he asked "got a girlfriend?"
"yea..." craig lied, he wanted to lie so that jack understood. that hey both understood that craig was okay, that he was coming home to his family and nothing else.
"Her name is Arwen" he said as he passed the Mcqueen house. he felt a surge of excitment untill it passed, just like the house did.

PART 7 CRAIG

As craig entered the pub, he looked around looking for something, he didnt know what but whatever it was, he didnt find it. He saw mercy and kris chattering away behind the bar. "get to work yous two" jack said as he walk to the bar."go ahead up son, your mam and charlie are up there."
mercy looked at craig and gave him a dirty look, "what he doing here," she said in her gravelly voice.
"hey, mind your own, we dont pay you for your poinions missy, get to work" jack said as darren came in.
"hey, just the person i wanted to see" and grabbing a pile of flyers from his bag he handed them to craig.
"tis your birthday bash, ive organised it all" he said laughing.
"NO!" craig said as he handing them back to him.
"awh come on", he said "it'll bring in a rake of money"
"yea, that s all you care about!" craig said resentlfully. he decided he'd meet his mam later and went out the door for some fresh air and a smoke.
"look, it'll be great, and you'll be able to show them that you dont care" darren said as he followed him out.
"about what?" craig said, knowing full well.
"about....any of that crap that went on last year."
"look,. thanks for the jesture and all but i dont exactly want to make a big deal about my being back..." but he didnt get to finish what he was sayin as darren ran accross the street to john-paul and some other guy. craig got such an overwhelming feeling of excitment in his stomack that he could even yell to darren to come back. craig avoided looking at jp as best he could, he wanted to run over, say hi, anything but stand there looking like an idiot. but no, he had decided. act distant. start the way you mean to go on. take time to decide what the hell you want to do then get the hell out of hollytoaks. thats what he decided. he could see darren give the flyer to jp friend. he knew by jp's expression that darren was probably being his usual annoying self. when darren came back toward craig, he said he had made sure jp wasnt going to turn up at the party.
"what? your such an idot darren, there is no party, okay?"
he said as he cursed at darren and walked back in to see his mother....

more please!!! Really good!!

good good

PART 8 JOHN PAUL

"woz talking to frankie today, seems craig had just got home when we saw him in the street. your beloved hasnt been ignoring you for as long as you thought" fr. keiran said sarcastically. he was still angry, even though craig hadnt been home when jp thought, he still didnt tell him, and that hurt.
"why were you talking to frankie?"
"OH, okay, well just make a list of the peoplie im allowed to talk to john paul and mail it to me!" fr. keiran replied stupidly.
jp diecide to be equally stupid, "well, the amount of time you spend here, i may aswell hand it to you"
"well maybe its time i spent less time here then, yea john-paul?"
"no" john paul got up and walked over, "look, l love you, i dont care about craig like that anymore. it just hurts that one of the greatest friendships ive had is litterly ruined, i miss him as a frend,nothing more.
" ilove you" jp said as he leaned in, but the noise of key in the door maked fr k leap back, as myra came in. john-paul was tired, both the loves of his life were embaressed to be with him, this is not how he invisioned his love life to be...

sorry for such a short chapter, just fixing a little mistake i made, did anyone notice it?!
it was just mainly to fix the problem, not to add to the story really, sorry. oh thanks for all ur nice comments xx

PART 9 CRAIG

Craig had ordered a glass of orange juice and was dying for a smoke but decided he wait a little longer, knowing Arwen she'd turn up just when he'd deicded to go out for one. she was late as usual, he had said he'd collect her at the airport but she said no. he hoped she didnt get lost. she had rang and texted him so much over the last week he felt bad for not leaving a note or telling her where he was. he thought he could leave his life in dublin behind but he had learned the hard way that you may be finished with the past, but the past aint finished with you. it always caches up with you. he was gald arwen had offered to come visit him, even though he felt guity she had to leave collage, although she really had everything covered, althogh she'd never think or say that. she's probably brought every book she owned with her, craig thought as he smiled to himself. he watched dom make mashed potatoes and serve them to his costomers. come on arwen, were the hell are ya,he thought. finally she brust in the door, he stood up to greet her but all he got in return was a dirty look.
" i should hit you" she said not exactly saying why yet, she was too preoccupied in setting her book on the table and taking off her bag. "got lost" she said in reply to his questioning look.
"so, why the hell did you just up and leave, tell me now" she said sitting down accross from him and folding her arms, obviously prepared to hear a long explaination.
"look arwen...-"
"dont "look" me, just tell me...NOW!" She said as she looked sternly at him,"im worried!"
"there's no need to be worried, im fine"
"tell me craig, or im leaving now, i'll stay with jp" she said, knowing that he'd be suprised at her mensioning him.
"what?" he laughed at the absurdity of her reply
"i met him" she said simply, "why havent ye caught up, thats what has suprised me most about this whole thing, i thought he was your best friend? you never stopped going on about how much you miss you 'best pal' while you were in dublin" she said now uncrossing her arms and looking concerned.
"when did you meet him,how? what did you say to him?" craig said, panic rising in his stomach for some unknow reason, he knew she knew nothing about what went on with him and jp.
"why are you acting so weord craig, whats the story?" she said, noting his worried look.
"i left because i had to think about things, about you and me" he lied.
"what?" arwen said, butterflies in her stomach, eager to know more. she had hinted more thn once that she wanted to be more than friends when they were in collage but he always let her know that he wanted only tro be friends, and friends they were, best friends. or so she thought....

PART 10 CRAIG

"Look craig, im going to pretend you didnt just say what you just said because there's something cother you and you know how i feel about you and i know you would never intentionally mess with me or my feelings for you. I know you dont feel that way about me, i tried, you knocked me back. we friends-best friends. im gonna go and order us some food and when i come back your going to tell me whats up, okay?" she said as she got up and left him to his thoughts.
Criag knew he shouldnt have pretended that it was because of her he left. knew that he was being a prick. He stared out the ill nosh glass door, accross the street he saw frankie and that man jp had been with the other day, he wondered how his mam and that guy met, what they had in common. he wondered if he was jp's boyfriend. He was touching charlies head and smiling at craigs mam, chattin away. craig hated him. arwen came back and interupted him by waving her hand in front of his eyes,
"what you looking at?" she laughed as she sat down, "i ordered two toasted sandwiches."
"woz looking at my mam" he said as he looked round at her.
"awh, thats your mum, i didnt know you had a little baby sibling."
"I dont....long story"
"lets go meet your mam" she said getting up.
"no, later....i wanna talk more about me and you, look i know ive been an idot, im sorry but i would like it if we tried, you know...to make a go of things" he said uncomfortably.
"lets see how thing go, im stayin for a while and hopefully we'll go back to collage together to do these stupid exams, yea?
"right" said craig smiling.
"but we call our selves friends for now" she said rather heisetently as dom came over with there sandwiches. she wished rather than believed that he was scincer in his proclaimed affection for her...there was definitly something wrong, she just wished she could get it out of him, she was determined she would though, preferably before the exams....

PART 11 JOHN PAUL

john paul and kieran had finally made up, john paul assuring kieran yet again that he loved him, as he did. they were happy, they loved eachother, the only problem was they had to hide it. john paul and kieran were just known to be friends around hollyoaks. people thought nothing of it because of the fact keiran was a preist, it just never entered their heads that they could be anything more- that would just be absurd. john paul and keiran had arranged to go to the dog that night, johnpaul wos just getting ready, all the time thinking. he had met arwen- craigs friend in town, him and keiran had been secretly aranging how to meet up that night, when she came running up to him, craig slowly lingering behimd her. she had arranged, without john paul remember that he had agreed to anything, for them to all meet up at the dog for a drink. craig glanced a quick look towards john-paul just as he had decided to look at craig and the look plainly said 'this was not my idea' jp tries to get out of it but she insisted, it was strange to be acepting to go for a drink with someone your hardly knew while not even talking to the person you knew most in the world...he hadnt spoken one work to him...."dont forget to bring your friend" she shouted as craig drgged her off. this is going to be eventfull thought craig as he put gel into his hair. someone knocked at the door, he knew it was keiran, he still knocked incase anyone other than jp was in. "It fine, coust is clear, come in" jp shouted.
"hey beautiful!" keiran said as he saw jp looking at himself inthe mirror.
"hey" jp had a feeling keiran wasnt dreading this night at all, infact jp thought this was going to be interesting for keiran. keiran was very insecure, with all the hiding that jp had to go through with him, he was afraid hed lose jp. jp knew that this was keiran chance to monitor craig and jp's relashionship, how the way with eachother would determine how he felt about his and jps relashionship, if they were solid or not....it make jp extra nervous. it would be hard enough without the extra attention he'd have to pay to keiran. jp was so confused, what was hement to feel? what are you ment to do when you are so in love with someone but they cant or wont be with you? do you try to move on, yea. and so he did. are you supossed to feel guilty that you may love someone else more, that this person is second best? or does that mean you have to break up with them and be alone? then when you decide to stay with them and finally feel you love them, what happens when the person you were so in love with come back and asks you out for a drink with your new boyfriend? yes, whatever happened tonight, jp felt it wasnt going to end good....it never did when it came to craig and jp...