Hi everyone. Just thought I would try and write another fic. It's about how all the ashworths are coping after Beth's death and is bits from each of their points of view. Please tell me what you think.

RHYS

I’m lying on our bed crying or should I say my bed now you’re gone. Today has been the worst day of my life. I’ve just come home from your funeral; I barely managed to get through it. I started crying as soon as I saw your coffin. That’s when it really hit me that I would never see your beautiful face again. I would never kiss your lips or hold you in my arms again. That’s what hurts the most. Knowing that you’re gone. I think before today I was in denial. I just couldn’t believe that you were gone. What am I supposed to do without you? After the funeral everyone kept telling me that in time I would get over you and the pain would ease but I don’t think that will ever happen. The pain I feel right now seems so real. Like it is alive. I must look like a wreck by now because I haven’t slept in days. I know I should but I can’t. Every time I close my eyes I see your face and the pain of losing you grows. I don’t know how I will cope without you Beth.

aw its really good

awwww
so sad
but really great!

Thanks for the comments. Here's the next part.

HANNAH

I’m standing outside Rhys’ bedroom door, not knowing if I should go in or not. I can hear him crying and feel I should be there for him; like he was for me all those months ago. I don’t know what to say though. Every time we’ve spoke since Beth died all that was said was a quick “Hello”. He’s my big brother and he needs me now more than ever but I can’t go in. As much as I want to it feels like I’m stuck to the spot I’m standing on; unable to move. He must be going through hell at the moment. I don’t know what I would do if I lost Danny. I know it’s different for Rhys because Beth was his sister and I still can’t bring myself to come even close to understanding their relationship. But when they were together after we all knew you could see that they genuinely loved each other and I really felt for them. I hate Beth for what she has done to our family but part of me wants to forgive her because she and Rhys were in an awful situation. I honestly do not know how I would cope if I found out Danny was my brother. I decide to go downstairs and leave Rhys alone for a while longer. Mum places a sandwich on the table in front of me before going out to work. Just seeing the sandwich makes me want to puke. I tell myself I should eat but once I again I can’t; instead I throw the sandwich in the bin and head over to Danny’s.

=]

I hope you all like the next part.

JOSH

I hate Beth. She has ruined this family. Before she came along we were like any normal family. Well Hannah had anorexia but apart from that; normal. Now Hannah is having a relapse, Rhys just locks himself in his bedroom and mum and dad don’t really talk much. Infact nobody talks much these days. I know it’s only been a couple of weeks since Beth died but it seems like our family is on a downward spiral and it feels like we’ll never see light again. I haven’t really been out much since; just sit moping around the house – feeling sorry for myself. When I do go out everyone just blanks me anyway; so I’ve given up. I’m worried about Han. I haven’t seen her eat much in the last couple of weeks. I hope she doesn’t stop again. I don’t think I can handle it again, especially not after the way I acted last time. I’m surprised she forgave me; after trying to stuff food in her mouth. What kind of a brother does that? I don’t even care what happens to Rhys cause he has ripped this family apart and I don’t think it will ever be normal again. When the hospital said he was unconscious I didn’t even want to see him; I didn’t want to know if he was going to be alright. I must be the worst brother ever.

its really good keep it up =)

your realy good!
i was getting in to that!
lol
great work!

This is great!
More soon please!

More soon?? please

Thanks for the lovely comments. Sorry I havn't updated in ages, been too busy with exams.

SUZANNE

I don’t think Hannah realises that I have noticed; but I do. I notice when half her meals end up in the bin. I notice when I leave her in the house alone all day, but when I come home, no food has been eaten. It’s the same with Josh. I notice when he stay’s in his room all day. I notice that he never goes out with his friends anymore; I don’t even know if he has friends anymore. I notice all these things but why did I not notice when my eldest son needed me? He needed me to help him but I wasn’t there for him. How could I not see the mess he was in? Beth and Rhys were sleeping together under the same roof and I didn’t notice. Neville has stopped loving me. He blames me for everything. He’s right! If I hadn’t slept with Noel then none of this would have happened. The one thing I notice more than anything is that my whole family is falling apart before my eyes and there is nothing I can do to stop it.

Please comment.

RHYS

Everyone was wrong. They all said that in time I would get over losing you; but I haven’t. Infact, everyday, the pain grows more and more. Every thought, from the moment I wake - till the moment I fall asleep again is of you. I keep thinking about all the good times we had together, all the times when we were happy. I remember the first time I saw you; when I knocked you off your bike. I sometimes wonder about what my life would be like if that never happened. You wouldn’t be dead and I wouldn’t be in as much pain; but we would never have shared so many happy moments. I would give anything to hold you in my arms again and see your beautiful smile. Anything. With you I could face anything. I can’t even leave my room anymore. Sometimes I even feel like ending it, just to stop the pain. I came so close to doing so two weeks ago. Then Hannah came in the front door. All I want is for the pain to stop and to be with you.

ive just read this all through there
really really good!
update soon?

p.s i really like how you wrote it as their views

Gd more soon

This is really good, i really like this and love how you've written it Can't wait for more

Thanks everyone. I totally forgot I had this fic, I've been so wrapped up in my others. I will update soon.

Hollyoaksmad2 how do we sign ur petition to hav a hollyoaks webcam ?

Go on to the show section on the hollyoaks forums and just sign your name. It should be near the top as I just bumped it for you.

whoo!
cant wait for more!

this is really gd..ilike how u have written it aswell..can't wait for more!! x x

HANNAH

Yesterday I was round at Danny’s and when I came home Rhys was lying on the couch. I didn’t really understand what was happening at first, and then I saw the box of tablets sitting on the table. That was when it hit me. Rhys was going to take an overdose. I rushed over to him to see how many he’d taken, but thankfully it turned out that he hadn’t taken any yet. I took the tablets and flushed them down the toilet, even though I knew he could easily buy another packet anytime he wanted. He looked a wreck, like he hadn’t slept for months. To be honest, he probably hadn’t. That was the first time I had ever seen him like that. Even at the funeral, he didn’t look that bad. It was like he had just given up on life. He just lay there with a photo of Beth in his hands and mumbled on about how much he missed her and how he wanted to be with her. I knew then just how much he had loved her, how he still loves her. I didn’t tell anyone what I saw. I kept it to myself as I didn’t want to worry them. It didn’t stop me worrying though. What if he tried again? What if this time he succeeded? I looked at my reflection in the mirror. All that stared back at me was an ugly, fat girl, so I held my hair back from my face and was sick in the toilet.


Please comment

Oh! You have anouther fic lol
Loved it Abit more depressing than the other one but still amazing! More..On both?? lol

Thanks. I will try and do some more on both of them some time today.

no hannah no!
really good cant wait for the next update!