Ext.
2 men talking outside standing with there golf clubs in hand dressed in the golf gear, camera can only see from waist up.
guy 1: so whats your handicap then man
camera cuts to guy2 and slowly drifts down to show his legs aswell.
Guy 2 pulls his trousers down a little bit and you see a small growling pitbull dog pop out the top of his trousers.
camera cuts to the guys face where he has a disapointed look, then cuts to Guy 1.
Guy 1: thats a nasty handicap you've got there.
end of script.

A Golfer is on the 18th green, about to make his last put of the round when a man comes running up to him: 'Sir, sir - your father has just died'
The golfer looks up, a solitary tear rolls down his cheek, and then he turns to putt, and says 'This one's for par'

INT OF CLUBHOUSE: PEOPLE ARE DRINKING AND TALKING ABOUT THEIR GAMES WHEN THE DOOR FLIES OPEN AND A MAN BURSTS IN PANICKING.

"Quick, is there a doctor in here, I've just hit a woman with a golf ball and I think she's dead!"

A MAN STANDS UP

"I'm a doctor, where did you hit her?"

THE OTHER MAN REPLIES

"Between the 1st and 2nd hole"

THE DOCTOR SAYS

"Christ! How did you manage that!"