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There is a fabulous book called "Raising Drug-Free Kids" by Dr. Aletha Solter, based on MODERN SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH!!!

Two of the many tips she gives for parents are:

1. NEVER LEAVE YOUR BABY TO CRY ALONE!!!
"Babies can feel terrified when nobody responds, and this abandonment can leed to feelings of powerlessness, lack of trust, low self-esteem, and chronic anxiety later in life."
"Crying may indicate a baby's need to release stress..."
"Pick your baby up and hold him while allowing him to cry in your arms..."
"Holding your baby when he cries is an excellent way to let him know that you will always be responsive to his needs and available to listen to his painful emotions and that you will love him no matter what he is feeling. If you continue to respond attentively as he grows older, he will bring his problems to you throughout childhood and adolescence, because he will trust in your ability to help or comfort him. ... This closeness, confidence, and trust will help inoculate your child against drugs."

2. RESPECT YOUR CHILD'S ATTACHMENT NEEDS
"Adults who lacked an early secure relationship with their parents often suffer from depression, anxiety, and the inability to form healthy relationships. These painful feelings can cause a person to use alcohol or drugs. Experiement with adult monkeys, who were offered a choice of alcohol or water, showed that those who were deprived of early contact with their mothers drank more alcohol."
"You can foster healthy attachment by frequently holding your baby, responding sensitively, and minimazing separations."
"A securely attached child is not necessarily independent... There is nothing wrong with catering to these legitimate needs for closeness, comfort, and attention. Children eventually outgrow these early attachment needs and become independent, but they do so on their own timetable. If you try to force independence to soon, you may encounter resistance and conflict..."
"By nurturing a strong attachment with your child during the first few years, you will give her a solid feeling of security and high self-esteem, which will be the root of later drug resiliance."

Of course, there is more in the book, but I can't write it all! Smile
 
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Someone on the other forum which has had over 10,000 views in the last 4 days suggested that bringing up your child on the 50's method would prevent anti social behaviour (ASB)...

I have also written posts on this forum re my experiences spanning 15 years with children and adults neglected in infancy in Romania and the results that i have witnessed. I also have worked for the 9 years with homeless people who have various complex issues ranging from poly substance and alcohol use and mental health / behavioural issues.

The majority of these people have disclosed neglect, abuse and trauma in childhood - basically they have NOT had, or had a disruption in their consistent, boundaried, responsive, loving, holding attachment.

Many, but not all are also routinely subjected to ASBO's as their overwhelming emotions now present in ASB. The majority of the others suffer from severe depression, suicidal ideation, mental illness, low self esteem etc etc etc the list goes on...
 
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All too true unfortunately, this method does lead to dissaster for most, I think the not responding to the babies crying doesn't make the baby settle into a routine and I think the woman (claire verity) need to apologise publically for her comments about new born babies being manipulative creatures.
 
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    C4 Forums    Life    Family    Raising Up Baby - Raising Drug Free Kids or why the 50s method is all wrong!