We have recently had a new addition to our family (3 weeks ago) and our new daughter seems to suffer with colic and cries alot unless held, feeding or sleeping.
This is fine (although hard work) but the issue we have is that our 2.5 year has become naughter as she obviously does not get as much attention as she used too. We feel bad for punishing/discipling her (ie naughty step/corner) as we realise this lack of previous attention to be the case. Should we punish in this way or is there a better way of dealing with this?

well, perhaps setting aside some quality time with your other daughter could help? perhaps someone could look after the baby for a few hours so you can talk the elder one out? do you make her feel involved with the baby, like asking her to help change a nappy, even if it's just holding the clean nappy for you?

Your baby, in her eyes is not the baby anymore. At her age there is no way that she can come to you and express her feelings of worry, doubt that the new baby will be loved more than she is. That everyone fussing about the new baby, the visitors, the presents will have made her feel so vulnerable and moved to the sidelines.
At her age, her world evolves around her, thats the way it is at that age.
Of course she is going to revert to behaviour tht is younger than what she is. She wants to be that baby, and if the only way she can get attention is by behaving as such then she wants to be that baby.
It's not punishment she needs, and that isn't the way to do it.
Reassure her that she is loved just as much now as she was before, that she is just as important.
Make some time just for your 2.5 year old. I know especially if you are up all hours with a collicky baby, and can think of nothing but a few hours sleep it can feel like crawling up a mountain, but believe me, make a great fuss of her, buy her a present and tell her its from the baby.
It works, trust me.

I have a 2.5 year gap between my kids and I remember my daughter behaved exactly the same way when my son was born. Like Jetty said, I found getting my daughter involved in changing baby's nappy helped with getting her involved and when I was feeding my son, she cuddled next to me looking at a book or playing with a toy.

Also when I could find a spare half an hour, I played dollies with her, just to let her know she has been pushed aside/forgotten.

Little things like this made all the difference and over time the naughty "looking for attention" behaviour stopped

I wish you all the best xxx

quote:

Originally posted by pgtipsy:
I have a 2.5 year gap between my kids and I remember my daughter behaved exactly the same way when my son was born. Like Jetty said, I found getting my daughter involved in changing baby's nappy helped with getting her involved and when I was feeding my son, she cuddled next to me looking at a book or playing with a toy.

Also when I could find a spare half an hour, I played dollies with her, just to let her know she has been pushed aside/forgotten.

Little things like this made all the difference and over time the naughty "looking for attention" behaviour stopped

I wish you all the best xxx

So sorry that was meant to say she has NOT been pushed aside/forgotten

Whatever must you think?!

quote:

Originally posted by pgtipsy:

quote:

Originally posted by pgtipsy:
I have a 2.5 year gap between my kids and I remember my daughter behaved exactly the same way when my son was born. Like Jetty said, I found getting my daughter involved in changing baby's nappy helped with getting her involved and when I was feeding my son, she cuddled next to me looking at a book or playing with a toy.

Also when I could find a spare half an hour, I played dollies with her, just to let her know she has been pushed aside/forgotten.

Little things like this made all the difference and over time the naughty "looking for attention" behaviour stopped

I wish you all the best xxx

So sorry that was meant to say she has NOT been pushed aside/forgotten

Whatever must you think?!

Lol. Don't worry, when you are getting your words out its hard to account for typo errors.