For all your hard work.
Sorry it's not quite up to your standard.

We all agree Adman
is a lovely fella
Though Jay wears a dress
and calls him Stella

To win the competition
was his one driving goal
So he pitched to the Devil
and sold him his soul

When the final curtain fell
on his smash West End hit
He then realised
he was deep in the ****

He arsked all his friends
what they thought he should do
Before the damn devil
called in his IOU

Jay said he’d come forward
to stand by his mate
But his wife said he couldn’t
play out so late

Lilmiss offered
a duvet or two
one in bright pink
and her favourite in blue

Lewes was the man!
with his pirates hat!
But he was out with playfull
woking the cat

Gravy of course!
he’d help out a mate
But he was with Minxy
deep in debate

Aurora the lionheart
where was she at?
Taking a break
With her tea & Kit Kat

Zabs said his skillset
All lay in IT
And fighting the Devil
Just wasn’t PC


Now the gates of hell opened
for Adman to step through
When along came young Didod
With a crate of LN2

The moral of the story
Is easy to see
takes Hell freezing over
to be one of three!

Poetry now!

It's at stage four, nurse.

Oh, oh, oh,
it's quite as bad as the Bernard Manning strain which infected Batley and the surrounding area in the late seventies!

It'll be the hairy hands, next, if I'm not very much mistaken.

Actually, playfull, that was pretty bad.

But not quite as awful as most of Adman's, so there is hope.

I'm touched.

Not as often as I'd like to be, it's true, but touched nonetheless!

But as you've mentioned everyone, it saves me having to write a whole bunch of new verse (or is that worse)!

Cheers Playfull - my 11 year old daughter was sent to hospital from school today, and what with hanging around A&E and losing precious invoiceable hours (not to mention having to postpone a meeting with a client who I'm hoping is going to ante up on a £1500 a month retainer) my day has gone to hell in a handcart. You've cheered me up no end!

Isn't this Forum brilliant?

That was nothing short of effing beautiful Playful!

Playfull! That's super. I'm in a poem. My life is complete! Hang the TPTT comp now.

It brings a tear to the eye...In a good sort of way.

Gosh fffolks,

What can i say?


Oh yeah, let me win, let me win!!

Does any one remember Esther Rantzen...
and those interminable chuncks of poetry people wrote to the gas board when things went wrong...

and didn't it make you want to vomit when the man from the gas board wrote back in verse?

Don't give me poetry, give me a reasonable level of service and a bill which is correct, say I!

Oh, yes, I've already said the poetry was cr*p haven't I?

But not such cr*p as Admans
and I did like the bit where Adman goes to hell.


PS. The stir-fried cat was delicious and made a welcome change from other people's kids.

And after i gave you a pirates hat Too!

Only a true sycophant would actually believe a funny hat could influence an independently minded critic.

Playful

I for one am deeply moved by your ode and have to say it is better than Admans jokes (not much I grant you - but better)

Now if we can all make a collective effort to get out more . . .

Lewes,

The 'only a true sycophant.....' gag was a rip off of the 'Life of Brian' gag - 'Only the true Messiah would deny his own divinity'

Thought you might have found it funny, sorry if you took offence.

Addy sorry to hear about your daughter - hope everything is ok.

You don't ever stop worrying about your kids even when they are big and hairy - and thats just my daughter!

Oh Damn, I'm in the s**t again with Minxy.

Playfull,
I got the reference.
I am not offended by you or by any on this forum I consider almost friends.

I hope I haven't offended you.

Hmm?
This could go on and on..

Yes, amidst this banter,
I forgot to pass my best wishes to Adman and to his daughter for a speedy recovery.
Done, belatedly.

Thanks Lewes,

quote:

Originally posted by Lewes:

Playfull,
I got the reference.
I am not offended by you or by any on this forum I consider almost friends.

I hope I haven't offended you.



Hang on i'm not sure now Lewes,

the use of 'or' is worrying me. Arghhhh

Hmm?
This could go on and on..

But not such cr*p as Admans
and I did like the bit where Adman goes to hell.

quote:

But not such cr*p as Admans
and I did like the bit where Adman goes to hell.

That's the last time I write YOU a poem you ungrateful old git!

quote:

That's the last time I write YOU a poem you ungrateful old git

Could I have this promise in writing please, Adman.

What else are you prepared to give up?

Jokes,
alcohol,
synchronised farting,
attempting to treat Moonbird [any of them] as a reasonable human being?

The first three - for you, my friend, absolutely!

As for the last - you offend me yet again! I wasn't aware that I had failed to treat any reasonable human being as a reasonable human being (see my early posting under 'Infamy'.)

By the way - great news! - I've found a poetry comp that's only open to 44 year old white alcoholic male bearded heterosexual married self-employed admen who live in Gloucester. The topic is 'Civil Servants Who Write Plays'.

Who says positive discrimination doesn't work?

I absolutely and unreservedly withdraw any suggestion, by me, that you failed to treat any one posting to this forum as a reasonable human being.

btw.
The above is not sycophancy, but clarification of a potentialy offensive ambiguity which may or not have been contained within a posting intended to be (at one and the same time) a jocularity and a mild reproof, the former being a response in a form recognized as acceptable between regular interlocutors,the latter being directed towards a individual who
at times may or may not have given the impression that they fail to distinguish between good natured banter and offensive material.

I hope that has cleared up any confusion.

Okay Humph!

Best of luck with the poem, btw.

It is just what English Literature needs;
more poems about civil servants.

Or by them?

My persona achieved motion aimlessly or without any destination lacking companions or companionship in the manner of a collection of visible airborne particles which is in not in stasis due to meteorological changes at the uppermost extremes of the stratosphere vertically adjacent to local and well-defined elevation of topography itself connected to an unobstructed major cleft with its progenesis in natural hydroengineering.

(Wordsworth, SEO/HO Grade)

You wandered lonely as a cloud?